Did you know I'm utterly insane?

theanti90smovement:

i cant believe how many friends i dont have

Three year-old me: oh my god dinosaur-shaped chicken nuggets.

Me now: oh my god dinosaur-shaped chicken nuggets.

theyellowbrickroad:

i get high self esteem when a cat that hates everybody else ends up liking me

emilioestevez:

story time

so about 7 months ago, my girlfriend at the time asked me to move in. so i did and we lived together for roughly 6 weeks. she asked me to move out until i was mature enough to live with a girl because in those 6 weeks i drew a dick on her face while she was sleeping 11 times.

pockytardis:

my favorite thing is when someone’s in the shower and you just hear a distant BANG BANG BANG CRASH and you can tell they knocked over like all of the shampoo bottles